In case you didn’t already know, Keith Richards used to snort whatever the fuck got in his path, back in the day. But I bet you didn’t know what the weirdest thing he ever snorted was.
That’s pretty insane. On the bright side, I bet he never leaves a mess wherever he goes.
It’s finally official… U2’s Bono is an asshole. I’ve never really had anything against U2’s music, but I’ve also never really liked it. And Bono has always looked like a conniving douche, but for reasons that I could never identify (although always wearing flagrantly fancy/hip sunglasses and referring to yourself by one name really helps)… until now.
This post isn’t about how much of a douche Bono is, though. It’s about what an asshole Bono is. The evidence? Right here.
You see, Bono thought it would be an excellent idea to spend 100 million, to only raise a measly 20 million for children with AIDS in Africa, through his Red Campaign. Now, I ain’t no mathematician rocket scientist 8 year old Clever Hans, but I’m pretty sure Bono would have been better off donating those 100 million Americans directly to the children in Africa. Now, I know that if he did that, nobody would have really found out about how much he cares about dying Africans. You see, if you’re a publicity whore like Bono, it makes absolute perfect sense to spend five times as much money telling everyone you care, than what you actually spend helping the people that you “care” about. As a gesture of gratitude, I think I speak for everyone when I say: Hey, Bono! Go fuck yourself!
I love music. I love it a lot. I do this weird thing when I listen to music. I usually tend to listen to music in cycles. Let me elaborate. It’s been a few years now, of me doing this, but I have found that nothing beats finding that band that just makes you believe that it’s the best band in the world. It’s the sweetest thing in the world, discovering that gem. What makes the discovery great, is not that moment that we all tend to experience when we usually blurt out “Oh, I love this fucking song!” No, it’s the instance when you simultaneously not only say, but mean it, when you say: “I fucking love this band!”
You incessantly listen to all of their tracks as much as you can, for as long as you can, hitting the repeat button several times. But like with most things in life, there is such a thing as overindulging. You will inevitably find the band become less and less appealing, and not because you realize that they aren’t as good as you originally thought they were(they’re just as good, and possibly even better). It’s because you listened to them too many times, like that “hit” song on the radio that you hear for the first time and fall in love with, and before you know it, every single radio station has it looping at the 15 minute mark of every hour. You end up hearing the song to the point of not only hating the song, but of hating the musician.
I did, by accident, many moons ago, learn how to not only keep from hating bands/musicians— I’m not talking about the synthetic, one-hit wonder tools that you hear on KISS, or most other stations for that matter— but to excitedly experience all of the joy and regalement that you experienced the first time, with maybe an added incentive. Kind of like a vaginal rejuvenation for the ears and soul, if you will (sorry for that, but it irks me to be too serious for too long). Continuing… I swear by this method, but it only works for that band whose album you can listen to without skipping tracks.
The “cycles” that I mentioned above, work for one or two or three bands, depending on the extensiveness of the band’s (or bands’) catalog. But listen to your musical treasure(s) like you normally, obsessively would. And right when you feel the need to skip over a track, that’s when it’s time to bury the cd(s). It can take some time, though, that’s for sure, but that depends on how many cds are available, or you are willing to you listen to. Time will pass, you will forget about the band almost completely, and fate will once again, reunite you with your sweetheart. It will be as if you’re listening for the first time, except you know the lyrics, so of course you’ll be making a scene as you sing your lungs out.
So I’ll end this post by shortly describing it’s inspiration. I was casually browsing YouTube, and had just finished watching a video of some guy explaining why he hated… I think like diapers or something (it was completely ridiculous)… when out of nowhere, the “related” sidebar contained an image of a very familiar group of individuals on a stage. To my surprise, it was non other than one of my favorite bands ever, Fugazi! The last time I listened to Fugazi was almost a year and a half ago. This was before I ever even knew of the existence of YouTube, so imagining that I’d ever see a video was completely unfathomable then, since going to one of their concerts wasn’t going to happen (they’ve been on “hiatus” for a few year now). But I pretty much relentlessly listened to them for a few months, during which a lot of significant things had happened in my life. The feelings, along with the myriad of memories/emotions that burst within me is indescribable.
In case you’re wondering about the vids I saw, which will, by the way, make you say “What the fuck? This is it? They ain’t that great.” They are:
Here
and
Then I searched for one of the contempts, too
It was 2004/05 all over again. The only thing that would have taken me back to that time so vividly, would have been, well, Marty McFly and an ‘85 DeLorean (with the flux capacitor package).
While I’m reminiscing, and since this post is already fuck long, tonight was made killer awesome by hanging out with one of my best buds, and all around awesome person, Alex, who is visiting from San Luis Obispo, as we reminisced about high school, drank beer, talked about life, became depressed, but then realized everything would be okay thanks to the random dance party started by about fifteen Scripps College girls.
Signing off: 3:14 AM
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